The Real maffioso world

23 May 2010 mandag

We live in a world today, where it is very important who you know and how you know them. Without knowing the right people you have to fight hard for every thing and if you do one small misstake you are in a way screwed – if you do not have a person backing yourself up. This i believe could concern all you daily habits. It is not that there are plenty of the maffioso groups that we know from the television around you, but just small invisible connections between people which are crucial to have. I do not think it is only me who have experienced that to get a job, you kind of need someone that you know to invite you to actually get the job? And to be able to climb the hierarchy at work or in other organisation, you need someone to speak good of you and introduce you to higher ranked people just to be able to show them how good you actually are. I do not mean that people get promoted that does not earn the position, but that some of us need to fight much harder to get there – if we lack the “maffioso” connections. I know that i use a hard word by calling this phenomena maffioso connections, but sometimes it really feels like it. Sometimes you fight so much for something and you would not even get close to get promoted and you do not even get a reason why your work is not enough to get there – when others can just roll in to the pedistal on a banana peel or shrimp sandwich as we call it in swedish!
I have ended up in this time period now, where i can only see this phenomena around me – which frankly make me angry and sad. There are some organisation that i worked for so long, and i am still on the same level as when i started. It does not matter how much energy i put in, how much time i spend on my duties or how loyal i am – i am still here. On the same step. And after 10 or more years, i am tired of not getting accepted or getting even some feedback of what i am doing wrong. Which makes me wonder, how long do i have to feel like a beginner or put up whit this non moving hierarchy before i actually can get where i want? I might just be paranoid, but sometimes i wonder why people just do not tell others what they should do better or at least ask why they do stuff like they do. Without any reflection – how should we be able to get better in what we do? And most important, how should we have energy to continue with what we are doing, if we do not get any respons? I do not know what other people feel about this, but i am really starting to get feed up. Why should i fight to get somewhere when i am not even moving anywhere? Why should i try, when i starting to doubt that i am not made for this kind of duty? How long could you work in a project/ organisation/ job before you “get it” that you just do not fit in – with out any feedback at all?
I am just so tired of fighting, trying to do the right thing without even getting any appriciation. Is life always like this?

Entry Filed under: Amandas thoughts